This year has been a constant reminder to give people their flowers while they are still alive. On 7th November 2020, we celebrated my mom as she was being honoured for her work in the Christian ministry. The Minister for National Guidance and Religious Affairs (yes, the Zambian government has such a ministry, just go with it) was on hand to present the award.
This gesture showed to my mother by “strangers” really reminded me that I need to be more intentional in showing appreciation and love to those around me, but especially my parents.
I went all out for this event and even got my mom a professional make-up artist and a professional photographer to capture the memories so I could focus on truly being in the moment with her. Of course, she did not let the make-up artist do much because she didn’t want to look “painted on” (whatever that means) but she was still very happy for the mini pampering.
Since moving back to Zambia after a decade away, I have relished every moment spent with my parents in Kitwe (which is a lot of moments, because I have no life there) and I attribute this to my growing older and realising just how blessed I am to have my parents still alive and in good health at their old age. My main love language, gifts, has also been activated and I can see now how it peppers my interactions with them now.
Aside from my parents, I am also trying to be intentional about showing everyone whom I care about that I do indeed, care about them. What does that look like? Constant check-ins, praying for them, supporting their businesses, affirming them when needed and being a listening ear.
While 2020 has been extremely kind to me, I know that for some people in my life, it hasn’t exactly been the best of years so I am holding space for anyone that needs it.
In being kind to others, I also learnt to truly appreciate the realest, most supportive person in my life; me! This year I really showed appreciation to myself like I would someone I deeply love. I am now a regular partaker of #SelfCareSundays, mental health days and I constantly give myself gifts, as opposed to just buying myself stuff (yes, there’s a difference). Self-love has become such an overused buzzword since social media became a thing and I have constantly had to remind myself that for me, it’s more than just a hashtag and it’s not always pretty or photo-worthy.
As I continue to love myself and others more intentionally, I invite you to do the same and share your experiences with me.
Thank you, Mwansa! I'm glad you found some inspiration in this piece.
I really wasn't sure where this was going at first (the first line and a half had me thinking someone passed away), but I love how you took a seemingly unrelated topic and educated and inspired us with your words.
Tosin, thank you for your comment! We have to love ourselves and others loudly and proudly.
Thanks for sharing Tuba, we should not be passive lovers but active ones especially towards ourselves. We tend to overlook that aspect alot. Thanks for this timely reminder and weldone for this great piece!
Tarisai!! My sisters Tarmpkin, Thank you for your kind words.